Each day brings more strangers smiling at me - Is it because I'm fatter than they are?

*Eyes lowered and all*
Voice over - Gabby Ma banne wali hai!
*Gabby hurries away (To the restroom actually. Yet again.)*
Voice over –Sharma gayi!

LOL! I’m PREGNANT! And I have been dying to tell you all about it. Pregnant women really, truly believe that the world is centered round their pregnancy and so the sooner they enlighten people about that, the sooner they can all understand their roles – they are but satellites to this planet called MY PREGNANCY, and then we can all talk about it. All the time. How cool no? I held back for four months because I figured that once we start talking about this great, great phenomenon, nobody (you can read that as I) will want to talk about anything else...and maybe 5 months of non-stop pregnancy talk might just be easier of my hapless readers that the full 40 weeks of it. You can all thank me later.

Gross things have been happening to my body and horror of horrors I am no longer noticing it. When one gross thing is over, another one starts. See if you were lying in a spotless pristine spa table draped in spotless white towels and a mosquito bites you in the centre of your back you would be horrified and complain but do you think prisoners chained in rat-infested underground dungeons stir when a roach runs up their leg? Same difference. There’s no longer the oh-my-god factor, it’s just a mild stirring of the conscious. You nod and move on. And now that you are all so interested in MY PREGNANCY, I might just tell all you about every roach, either in passing, or in great detail. So you can either gag or grin, depending on your respective tolerance levels. Sit back, it will be great :)

I bid goodbye to predictability a long time ago. I don’t know what I will feel in the next 5 minutes, I don’t know what I will want to eat, I don’t know WHEN I will fall asleep. I don’t know when I will laugh and more importantly when I will cry. Granted “Notebook” was a bad choice for this hormone plagued body but Mr.Gabby lost it when he caught me crying while watching the Apollo mission on the History channel. My explanation between ribcage-shattering sobs of how “They had all worked so hard! Too hard!” didn’t quite cut it. But he played his comforting part to the T. After all, I am but a vessel for his procreation here, and we do not let him forget that. So I bid goodbye to self-control. I am also bidding good bye to all my ultra low waist fashions and the teeny little tees and those sexy bitches called high heels...comfort is paramount now. And no, I’m not giving all my clothes away, so stop forming that line ladies! I aim to get back into them. Laugh all you want people, I will do this. I can do this. I hope to do this. I will do this? God, please let me do this. Pulllleeeaze let me do this GOD!

When I first found out, I talked to friends who have recently acquired the Mommy tags, hoping that they would dish on all the crazy stuff. But horror of horrors that Mom-amnesia is not a fable! They REALLY forget all the scary parts. They gush and tell you it will all pass and it’s all so worth it and “Think of it, you’ll have a cute little Gabby at the end of this!” Pretty nice to hear and all...but these babies, they do not drop from the sky you know, and EVERYTHING is going to change. FOREVER. How can all that be cute and warm and sunny? Floral maternity frocks, glowing skin and hubbies tying your shoe laces on sunny park benches is for the ads...what happens in REAL life? Give me THAT!

Very, very luckily for me, I have 4 friends who are going though this with me.(Yes, 4. It's like we have taken it upon ourselves to boost the desi population of the New England area.) They are all about a month or two ahead or behind me in this and they all extremely vocal with their complaints. So we all get together and complain. It’s beautiful, all that free flow of knowledge, makes for many, many interesting discussions. Interesting how “horrifying” turns “interesting” when it happens in the collective. All that letting out feels so good. Well I can’t really discuss how my belly button is starting to look slightly distended with people at work now, can I?

As we head towards that much awaited 40th week, we rush though doing this and that. Preparing the nursery, and the guest rooms, for all the different relatives who will be visiting. Yes the in-laws will be here too. More on that later. Much more on that later! :) The delivery itself is a much discussed topic. Mr.Gabby doesn’t do so well in hospitals. He assures me he will be the best birthing partner ever (like I have any data points to compare him with!) but this image of Mr.Gabby fanning himself in a corner of the labor room with an IV drip on his arm is just not leaving my head! We can’t have him hogging all the attention, can we? After the baby arrives, it will anyway be about the baby. Let me make a scene while I can at least! My Mom worries “You, you, you! How will you make a hole in all that selfishness for the baby?” How will I, I wonder!!!! :)

So in case you did not get the drift yet there will be a lot of pregnancy talk on this blog. But people remind us that these are the last few months of Mr.Gabby-and-I kind of stories and we are trying to make the most of that. So there will be other stuff too. Don’t run away guys!! I haven’t even told you about my yoga classes and all the hot and verrry flexible chicks there yet!