Feeling...

The weeks after the Maharaja was born were some of the most confusing of my life. The expected feelings of excitement, fatigue and exhilaration were all there and I was prepared for it. But what was somewhat disconcerting was the fact that I missed him. I missed having him inside me. When it used to be really and truly, the two of us. When the kicks and rolls were exclusively mine. As the weeks turned to months, I learned to share. He would gurgle to others, he would smile at everyone (Yes, literally, everyone – much to the amusement of the cashier at BabiesRUs or any random stranger on the street for that matter) and its okay. I can deal with that, I think.

This weekend my baby was introduced to solids. The way he has been watching us eat has made it quite evident that he is interested. With eager excitement, I spooned in the tiniest portion of rice cereal into his open, fish-like mouth, but he shoved it out using both his tongue and his arms, with Lilliputian-Herculean strength. Then he proceeded to spit out what little had made it in, with deliberation and patience. I felt a small, vaguely familiar, sense of relief.

You will invariably, lose your dependence on me, step by step...But let’s stretch this out as far as we can little fella! To live is to be slowly born, and you make me feel like I’ve only just begun.